


Tony Stark, Doo Doo Doo-Doo Doo

by rebelmeg, sleepoverwork



Series: Rebelmeg's TSB Fills 2020 [6]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Adorable Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe), All the teens are little shits, Cute, F/M, Family Dynamics, Fluff and Humor, James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark Friendship, Parent Pepper Potts, Parent Tony Stark, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony's Adopted Teenagers, Uncle James "Rhodey" Rhodes, We're going to get this song stuck in your head
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2020-03-15
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:14:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23153074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rebelmeg/pseuds/rebelmeg, https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepoverwork/pseuds/sleepoverwork
Summary: Tony has Dad Brain, Morgan is disinterested in her nap, FRIDAY is amused, and a whole pack of teenagers are watching it unfold from behind the couch.
Relationships: Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe) & Tony Stark, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark
Series: Rebelmeg's TSB Fills 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1591063
Comments: 30
Kudos: 197
Collections: I Needed a Laugh Today, IronDad (and his Spiderson), Tony Stark Bingo 2020





	Tony Stark, Doo Doo Doo-Doo Doo

**Author's Note:**

> WE'RE FILLING ALL THE SQUARES!!!
> 
> Title: Tony Stark, Doo Doo Doo-Doo Doo  
> Collaborators: sleepoverwork (2078), rebelmeg (3055)   
> Squares Filled:   
> For sleepoverwork: **TSB** , square R2 - All's Well That Ends Well  
> For rebelmeg: **TSB** , adopted square - Iron Dad, and **Pepperony Bingo** , square B1 - "Please."  
> Ship: Tony & Morgan, Pepperony, MIT Bros, Tony & MCU Teens  
> Rating: Gen  
> Major Tags: fluff and humor  
> Summary: Tony has Dad Brain, Morgan is disinterested in her nap, FRIDAY is amused, and a whole pack of teenagers are watching it unfold from behind the couch.  
> Word Count: 3935

“So help me, if you come up with another bad pun, I am going to forcibly remove your kidney through your nostril.”

And yeah, okay, Peter kind of believed that MJ would absolutely follow through on that threat, so he shut his mouth before his next pun escaped.

Harley, however, who was probably the physical embodiment of chaos, had no such scruples.

“I don’t think I wanna _nose_ what that would look like.”

MJ pitched an appropriately named throw pillow at him while he cackled.

To add insult to injury, Shuri leaned over to whisper to Harley, “It's your pun-ishment,” low enough for it to escape MJ's ears.

"Who invited you again?" Harley tsked.

"Peter, " Ned pitched in (un)helpfully. "She's studying at Midtown High with us for junior year."

"And we-" the Wakandan princess added with a grin, "are breaking down the nuances of species richness for Ms. O's Advanced Biology class."

The five of them were sitting on the floor of the living room in the Stark living quarters at the back of the Avengers Compound, leaning against the big sofa in the living room area and passing several bags of chips back and forth. It was an open floor plan, and the huge kitchen was behind them, over the back of the sofa on the other side of the room, with the door and entryway to left. Rock music was playing quietly through the hidden speakers in the walls, and Tony was nowhere in sight.

“What are we waiting for, anyway?” MJ asked, loading up with another throw pillow, just in case. “What’s Tony doing?”

Harley jerked his thumb in the direction of the bedrooms down the hall. “Morgan won’t take her nap, he’s trying to negotiate with her.”

Shuri raised an eyebrow. “And exactly how does one negotiate with a six-month-old baby?”

Ned grinned a little. “Mostly with extravagant bribes and yammering at her until she falls asleep, if past events are anything to go by.”

“So… this happens a lot?” MJ asked.

“Enough that FRIDAY is keeping a list of all the things Tony promised to buy Morgan if she’ll go to sleep.”

The AI chimed in, “The list is currently forty-nine items long. My personal favorite is ‘a real live Ninja Turtle’.”

Peter nodded, “Morgan gets her sleeping habits from her dad, absolutely.”

The sound of a door closing down the hall had all of them all craning their heads to look around the couch, and over the edge of it they saw Tony come into the living area, with a wide-awake Morgan in his arms. Peter was just starting to get up when Tony started talking, but not to him.

“You’re really cramping my style, little button. This is unacceptable behavior, you know. You wanna know how much money a normal adult would pay to get to sleep during the day without being judged for it? You should count your lucky stars. Or sheep, whatever gets you to sleep faster. FRIDAY, start some coffee, wouldja? I’m more tired than she is.”

The teens, with grins of delight on their faces, all quietly shifted so they were all peering over the back of the couch, still out of sight of the babbling genius as he continued talking to the baby in his arms, the coffeemaker burbling in the background.

“I’ve got important things to do, you know, I’m a very busy man. I don’t actually remember what it is I was supposed to be doing this afternoon, but that’s beside the point. Trying to coax my sleep-shunning but overall superior childthing to sleep was not part of the itinerary, I am very sure.”

“I could always inform you what appointments you have, boss.” FRIDAY suggested, managing to sound both exasperated and teasing.

“Nope, a bet is a bet, and I am going to win. Nobody accuses me of having dad brain and gets away with it.”

“I’m sure Colonel Rhodes deeply regrets his actions and lives in fear of your impending victory.” FRIDAY sassed back, at which Tony stuck out his tongue.

The teens all stifled giggles as they silently watched and listened to Tony, who was blatantly oblivious to the fact that he had a bunch of teenagers sitting on his living room floor across the room, peering at him over the back of the couch. Because he started singing as he made faces at Morgan, completely ignoring the AC/DC song already filtering through the room, and his song was instantly recognizable though the lyrics had been altered.

_“Baby Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Baby Stark doo doo doo-doo doo, Baby Stark doo doo doo-doo doo, Baby Stark!”_

With that, Tony raised Morgan’s fist in the air as if she were cheering, and went, “Whoo!” before launching into the next verse, accompanied by Morgan kicking her legs and cooing like she knew this game and loved it.

_“Mommy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Mommy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Mommy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Mommy Stark.”_

In a falsetto voice, “She’s hot!” And on to the third verse.

_“Daddy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Daddy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Daddy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Daddy Stark!”_

Another fist pump, “Iron Man!”

_“Rhodey Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Rhodey Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Rhodey Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Rhodey Stark!”_

“War Machine!”

_“Happy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Happy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Happy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Happy Stark.”_

“Grumpy face!”

_“FRIDAY Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, FRIDAY Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, FRIDAY Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, FRIDAY Stark.”_

“Smartie pants!”

_“Peter Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Peter Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Peter Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Peter Stark.”_

“Spiderman! But it’s a secret!” Tony whispered the last part and covered his lips, which Morgan copied.

Ned, MJ, Shuri, and Harley all looked at Peter, who was such a bright shade of red that there was practically steam coming off him.

Tony wasn’t finished, however.

_“Harley Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Harley Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Harley Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Harley Stark.”_

“We’re connected!”

Peter was joined in his embarrassment (and secret delight) by his brother-from-another-mother as soon as Harley’s name was mentioned. Ned was practically cooing at them, even going so far as to pinch Peter’s cheek, and Shuri and MJ were falling all over each other in silent giggles. Harley, who was every bit as red as Peter, was trying to glare at them, but he was obviously too pleased at being part of Tony’s song to make an honest effort.

“I feel like that’s the theme song to the hit new series, Stark Week,” Ned muttered under his breath as they all watched Tony’s antics with his daughter, now twirling in slow circles while he rocked Morgan in his arms and sang the Dum-E and U verses.

“It’s like Shark Week but better,” Shuri whispered, and Peter knew it was coming before Harley said it.

“Are you saying you’d _tuna_ in for Stark Week?”

There was a muffled thump as MJ retaliated again with a throw pillow, and a smothered laugh from Harley. It was really probably a good thing FRIDAY hadn’t turned off the music (Black Sabbath was on now), or they would have been discovered ages ago.

Shuri continued as if there’d been no interruption, adopting a very David Attenborough tone to her voice as she whispered, “Observe the Stark in his natural habitat, protecting his young while his mate is out providing for the family.”

Peter nearly lost it and started laughing, barely getting his hands up in time to keep it inside so Tony didn’t turn around and find out he was being watched. As the baby-laden billionaire passed the kitchen, he made a detour to the coffee machine and made a deeply inappropriate noise as he took his first sip.

Morgan reached for the mug with both hands, but Tony just hummed a “nuh uh” kind of noise into it and turned his head. “I don’t think so, you naughty child. Only children that sleep at night get to enjoy the decadence that is freshly brewed coffee.” 

“Oh, that filthy hypocrite,” Peter muttered in a scandalized tone, watching as Tony set down his half-emptied mug and grabbed a handful of M&M’s from a glass candy dish on the counter, popping a few in his mouth as he resumed humming the song. “He sent me a YouTube link to funny cat videos last night at four in the morning.”

MJ snorted a laugh and took a turn narrating, dropping her voice low as Tony grabbed another handful of M&M’s. “Food hunting and gathering is an important part of the Stark’s life. He will be satisfied with obtaining easy sustenance that he leaves about in great quantities, or will forage outside his den. Favorites for a hungry Stark are pizza, a never-ending supply of coffee, and literally anything that can be delivered to his door.”

Ned was silently laughing so hard he was starting to turn red, and he buried his face in the couch cushions to keep any noises contained.

A huge, dramatic sigh got their attention again, and the teens refocused on the object of their entertainment.

“Morgaaaaaaan,” Tony all but whined, switching the baby up to his other shoulder while she babbled to herself quite loudly and sucked on her fist. “Sleeeeeep, I beg of you. Pleeeeease.”

Harley took a turn narrating, “The Stark is known to exhibit highly hypocritical behavior, chastening his young for adopting the same behaviors he himself participates in freely.”

Peter snorted, a little louder than he meant to, but luckily it was covered up by Tony fishing for another handful of M&M’s as he kept bobbing and rocking. Morgan didn’t seem to mind a bit that her daddy was being driven slowly insane, nomming on his shoulder and leaving behind a respectable wet spot. 

"Morgan, Morguna, my little honey nut Cheerio, if you go to sleep I will buy you a sparkly pink monster truck for Christmas. And if you do it in the next five minutes, I'll throw in a fluffy pink steering wheel cover, absolutely free!"

“Boss,” FRIDAY interrupted fondly as she projected a very long list for the teens, headed _Morgan Bribes_ with _"Sparkly pink monster truck with a fluffy pink steering wheel cover"_ glowing in red at the bottom, “the Big Boss is calling.”

“Pep?” Tony’s disheartened slouch disappeared immediately as a wide, boyish grin spread over his face. “Put Mama Stark through, FRI.” 

Shuri took up the narration again, “Observe the behaviors the Stark adopts when in contact with his mate. Even though she can’t see him, he subconsciously smiles and stands up straight at the thought of hearing her voice.”

“And it’s cute as shit,” MJ muttered as an aside.

Tony, still oblivious, turned to Morgan, who was still ignoring everything around her, determined to cover Tony’s shoulder with drool.

“You hear that Morgan, Mama’s coming home soon and I’m going to be in so much trouble if you don’t go to sleep soon. We don’t want that, right? We love Dadd—”

“Tony,” Pepper cut off his mini-rant, sounding equally exasperated and affectionate. “Why is your daughter still up?”

“No no no, Pepper, my heart, my true love, my breathtaking and brilliant wife. The child in my arms is Morgan’s imaginary twin, who suddenly isn’t so imaginary. Our loving daughter is fast asleep.”

Morgan chose that moment to let out a squeal, presumably delighted to hear her mother’s voice, but by the betrayed look on her father’s face, the peanut gallery of teens could very well believe it was some diabolical plot of the youngest Stark.

“Hello baby,” Pepper’s soft voice rang through FRIDAY’s speakers. “Are you giving your poor father trouble?”

Morgan babbled back, arms swinging around herself in excitement. Tony beamed as his wife continued talking to Morgan as if her baby-talk was comprehensible. 

“I see. Well baby, your father isn’t getting any younger and between you and me, he needs his beauty sleep otherwise he gets cranky.” Pepper’s voice dropped into a conspiratorial whisper by the end of her sentence.

“Hey,” Tony squawked in mock-outrage, “I resent that Pep. There is nothing I can say in retaliation because with every passing day your beauty grows—” Morgan smacked him right in mouth, prompting another round of giggles at her father's shocked expression.

“I’m on my way home, I decided to cut out early. Do you think you can negotiate your way into having her down for a nap by the time I get there? I’ll make it worth your while.” The way Pepper’s voice changed, going suggestive and sultry, made all five of the teens exchange awkward, red-cheeked glances.

“As much as that would be the absolute highlight of my day, I think I have something going on this afternoon, I just can’t remember what. Raincheck for tonight, though?”

“Are you still trying to prove to Rhodey that you don’t need FRIDAY to give you appointment reminders? Tony, it’s been a week and a half.”

“It’s the _principle_ of the thing, Peppermint, I have to prove him wrong!”

Pepper sighed in a long-suffering way, but let it slide. “Have it your way, then. Put it on your mental calendar for tonight, our raincheck date. Morgan, you better cooperate with your bedtime tonight or you and I will have words, young lady.”

The baby looked appropriately solemn at her mother’s words, at which Tony glared a little. “She does this on purpose, she likes you better.”

Sounding like she was trying not to laugh, Pepper assured him that couldn’t possibly be the case and reluctantly hung up with an “I love you” to her husband and daughter. 

Peter jumped into the relative silence quickly (Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" had just started), returning to their narration as he whispered, “When the Stark becomes aware of the impending arrival of his mate, he is even known to spruce up his appearance and tidy his den, in order to ensure her approval and happiness.”

“Shut up, he does not.” Harley interrupted.

“He does too,” Peter and Ned said in unison, and Peter continued with, “He knows Pepper likes to play with his hair and he makes it all messy before she comes home, you watch.”

Precisely as the Spiderling predicted, Tony bounced Morgan a little higher against his chest and ran a hand through his hair, rumpling up the previously neat style. MJ choked.

Once he deemed himself suitably ruffled, Tony, still oblivious to his audience, readjusted Morgan in his arms so he was rocking her again, then picked up again with his new theme song. He changed up the rhythm this time, his voice slow and lilting and he crooned the words, obviously making another attempt at lulling the baby to sleep. 

_“Sleepy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Sleepy Stark doo doo doo-doo doo, Sleepy Stark doo doo doo-doo doo, Sleepy Stark.”_

Apparently, this time his words were a clear desperate attempt to convince Morgan to keep a healthy sleep schedule.

_“Go to sleep, doo doo doo-doo doo, go to sleep, doo doo doo-doo doo, go to sleep, doo doo doo-doo doo, go to sleep. Please.”_

For a moment, it almost looked like it was working. Morgan had heaved a deep sigh and snuggled into her daddy’s chest, but the moment he stopped singing she was wiggling again.

“Boss,” FRIDAY quietly interjected before Tony could resume his lullaby, “Colonel Rhodes is also on his way.”

“Oh!” Tony brightened, “Was that what my thing this afternoon was?”

“No, it was not.”

Tony legitimately pouted. “I don’t like this game. Whose idea was this?”

“The attempt to get you to remember your own schedule without reminders or writing it down? Yours.” 

The teens collective broke out into silent giggles.

Ned had perked up when FRIDAY told Tony that Rhodey had stopped by (he was very much a War Machine fanboy), and he took his opportunity to contribute to the narration. “What luck! The Stark is being visited by a friend, and we are lucky enough to witness it. Though friendship behaviors amongst this species are widely varied, the Stark is among the most affectionate. Let us observe what he does when greeting his friend.”

“And if you stick with us through the commercial break to watch these two test new flight patterns, you’ll also get to observe the Stark _yeeting_ his friend.” Harley beamed, the glint of the devil in his eye.

MJ nearly knocked Peter right over when she lunged at Harley, swatting at him without mercy.

Harley tried to fend her off and remain silent at the same time. “Stop smacking me, everyone likes puns!”

MJ’s whisper-scream was full of righteous rage. “THEY’RE NOT EVEN GOOD PUNS, KEENER, NOW STOP IT.”

“Yes,” Shuri snickered, “you’re being a pun in the ass.” She wisely was out of range of MJ’s immediate retaliation, but that didn’t mean she was clear from the death glare the teen sent her.

“You’re on thin-fricking-ice, Princess,” MJ hissed.

And kind of scuffle that might have ensued was derailed when the front door was opened, Rhodey walked in.

“Hey platypus!” Tony greeted cheerfully. “You know any good knock-out remedies for stubborn six-month-olds?”

“I used to crush up sleeping pills and hide them in your food sometimes in college,” Rhodey replied easily, as if the question wasn’t at all out of the ordinary.

Tony’s expression of shocked betrayal was absolutely hilarious. “What?! Deceived by my own roomie?!”

“Hey, if you’re gonna stay up for seventy-two hours straight and consume nothing but stale coffee, you deserve whatever happens to you.” Rhodey grinned as he approached Tony and Morgan started squealing, waving her hands in excitement at seeing him. “Hello, babygirl! How’s my favorite Stark today?”

Tony sniffed in offense as he handed the baby over. “Rude. That’s very rude. I’ve been replaced by a human that can’t even talk yet. In my own home! By my own honeybear. Nothing is sacred anymore!”

Rhodey looked like he was fighting back a response to that, when his eyes happened to fall on the group of teens across the room, still hiding behind the couch. He opened his mouth, a question on his face, when they all urgently put their fingers to their lips. Looking bemused yet amused, Rhodey nodded and changed the subject.

“I don’t suppose you remember why I came over?”

“What, my sparkling personality isn’t good enough for you?”

Rhodey grinned almost evilly. “Dad brain strikes again.”

“I DO NOT HAVE DAD BRAIN,” Tony gritted through his teeth, while smiling at Morgan.

“Then tell me what we’re doing today.”

Tony immediately opened his mouth to reply, stalled out, and was only saved from being mercilessly teased by the sound of the door opening. He turned towards it with a huge grin, and swiped Morgan back from Rhodey to hold her up so Pepper could see her, as if he were presenting the new lion king.

“Look, Baby Stark! It’s Mama Stark!”

“Anthony Edward Stark, what did I tell you was gonna happen if you got that godforsaken song stuck in my head again?” Pepper’s eyes were all but spitting fire as she dropped her briefcase on the floor and glared at her husband.

His eyes were wide with something akin to horror while Rhodey covered his mouth to hide his grin. “I’d be on dirty diaper duty for a solid month.”

Pepper nodded. “Better stock up on wipes, honey, because we just started her on baby food and that innocent infant poop is going to very quickly turn into nuclear waste.”

Tony pouted, looking extremely put out. “I didn’t even sing it this time.”

“You didn’t have to, it’s cursed.” Pepper was still frowning, but her eyes were twinkling when she kissed Tony on the mouth, Morgan on the forehead, and Rhodey on the cheek. “Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but there is someone in this room that should be sleeping.”

Tony pointed accusingly at Morgan, who was back in Rhodey’s arms and nomming contentedly at his thumb. “Not my fault. I tried.”

“By singing her that damn song?”

He blinked a few times. “Ummm…”

“That song that gets her all riled up and excited as it makes me contemplate death?”

“Ummmm…”

“I thought so.”

Looking like he’d tuck his tail between his legs if he had one, Tony slunk away, presumably to Morgan’s room, with Rhodey cackling underneath his breath, and the baby in tow.

Pepper sighed in both fondness and exasperation and stood there a moment, before looking directly at the pile of half-hidden teenagers on the floor, and winking.

“Dad brain.”

Now that their source of entertainment had been shamed back to the nursery, the pack of teenagers got up from behind the couch, laughing and spreading around the room as they chatted with each other and Pepper. Big Boss Stark had just taken off her high heels and was about to head for the master bedroom to change when Tony came charging back down the hall, nearly hollering.

“I REMEMBER WHAT IT WAS!”

Pepper and all five of the teenagers jumped as he all but exploded into the room, looking triumphant.

“I REMEMBER WHAT IT WAS, AND I REMEMBERED ALL BY MYSELF!” A faint flush tinged his cheeks as he looked at his wife. “Pretend I didn’t sound like a little kid just then.”

Harley popped an M&M into his mouth, then passed the candy bowl along. “Nope.”

“GAH!” Tony put a hand on his chest as he jumped and turned around. “What the hell, when did you guys get here?”

Peter shrugged as he took the M&M’s, “Like an hour ago.”

Tony’s eyebrows furrowed. “No you didn’t.”

“Did too,” Shuri countered.

“Noooo, you didn’t, because I’ve been here all day and I never saw you or heard you come in.”

“Oh, we know.” MJ’s faint grin was absolutely shit-eating as she stole some M&M’s right out of Peter's hand.

Tony squinted. “But then where…”

With a huge grin on his face, Ned started it off, and was swiftly joined by the rest of them. _“Baaaabyyyy Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Baby Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Baby Stark, doo doo doo-doo doo, Baby Stark,”_

And, as one, the five of them did a fist pump in the air, and whooped.

Not only did Pepper burst out laughing, but they could hear Rhodey down the hall, presumably still in the nursery with Morgan, laughing as well. Tony, looking like he either wanted to crawl under the floor or maybe join in, just covered his face with one hand and shook his head. 

“I asked for this. I legitimately asked for all of this, the adopted and obnoxious teenagers, the nap avoidant Morguna, the idiot best friend, the wife laughing at my expense, I willingly and eagerly walked into every single bit of this.”

“And you wouldn’t change a thing.” Pepper wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek.

He didn’t say anything, but it was very clear from the look on his face that he wasn’t going to disagree. With one arm around Pepper, Tony opened the other for the kids to pile into a group hug, which was quickly joined by Rhodey and one still gleefully awake Morgan. FRIDAY even directed a very confused Happy, and the excited bots, into the room so the whole family could enjoy the enormous hug.

And then Morgan _finally_ let out a huge yawn.


End file.
